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justusducks:

clintbarttons:

where do i sign up to become an amazon

I loved her in this movie

(via southerngamerguy)

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Anonymous said: Fellas, how did you learn to go down on a girl? I know practice makes perfect but this seems like one of those things that always needs experience to even get started.

bootyscientist:

lovelyandbrown:

brigittefires:

lovelyandbrown:

Bryant: it takes practice. it takes being humble because you should always be open to new techniques…never settle. eat pussy like an underdog. 

Me: O_O

Take a peach. Bite a big ol’ hunk out of it. Now, figure out how many different ways you can lick that peach. Seriously, keep count. Now try to replicate some of them. Do that, before you read on. I’ll wait.

When you’re done, eat the rest of that peach. If you aren’t disgusted by how much slobber is on that peach, then you have not found enough ways of licking it yet. Try to nibble the peach without piercing its flesh. Keep going with all the parts of your mouth until you can’t hold onto the peach anymore because it’s too slippery. Did you lick the pit a bit too? No? Better get your ass another peach.

Now take a strawberry. Lick, suck, and nibble that strawberry from the peak end until you get it about half gone. Lick the strawberry to death, too, but don’t be afraid to get on that green-leafy section too. You might be surprised at how the licks you tried on the peach are different, and how the seemingly-unappetizing green leafy part really isn’t so bad (especially after your tongue is covered in strawberry juice anyway). Why yes, that is a euphemism for pubic hair! You’re learning! Try to nibble the strawberry without piercing its flesh.

Now find a willing partner and SPECIFICALLY ASK THEM if they would be willing to have you go down on them and give you feedback, both during and after. Put one hand on their hip, and one hand on their breast (you did wash them first, right?)—let’s leave your hands out of this, for now. Allllll those different licks and nibbles, try them out on all the different parts going on down there. Part labia, move it around, find the clitoris, all with your tongue and lips, and no fingers allowed. Nose is cheating but if you use it we will let it slide. Try things a few times in a row and see what your partner says, if anything, and then do something else a few times. Don’t do any one thing for too long, unless your partner tells you not to stop or moan in disappointment when you change it up a bit.

After your partner has declared themselves spent, then and only then may you stop. Jaw hurts? Use your lips closed for a while, or open up more. Drowning? Good job, there are worse ways to go.

Now, go forth, and take that pussy to church!

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awfulbear:

sharkchunks:

metalheadadam:

pimpinchilton:

commanderabutt:

shadow1423:

commanderabutt:

spaff-der-kegel-doer:

historynet:

seen on my face book feed(Anti-vaccination, modern)

"studies"

who has ever thought this ever

Don’t let your children drink water it might make them think drinking other clear liquids is okay do you want your child drinking bleach

don’t let your children walk, it might make them think its okay to walk away from home

Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure not even people who use heroin believe it is beneficial.

Don’t let your child breathe air. Studies have shown thatin the event of a fire, children who breathe in air are much more likely to breathe in smoke than children who’ve never breathed air.

Don’t have a child. 100% of children grow up and die. You’re literally condemning your own children to die.

This post is the winner I’m packing up my shit and closing my blog good night America sleep well!

awfulbear:

sharkchunks:

metalheadadam:

pimpinchilton:

commanderabutt:

shadow1423:

commanderabutt:

spaff-der-kegel-doer:

historynet:

seen on my face book feed(Anti-vaccination, modern)

"studies"

who has ever thought this ever

Don’t let your children drink water it might make them think drinking other clear liquids is okay do you want your child drinking bleach

don’t let your children walk, it might make them think its okay to walk away from home

Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure not even people who use heroin believe it is beneficial.

Don’t let your child breathe air. Studies have shown thatin the event of a fire, children who breathe in air are much more likely to breathe in smoke than children who’ve never breathed air.

Don’t have a child. 100% of children grow up and die. You’re literally condemning your own children to die.

This post is the winner I’m packing up my shit and closing my blog good night America sleep well!

(via fitzlblick)

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libraryjournal:

The launch of Kindle Unlimited alters the competitive landscape for all providers of ebooks, including libraries.

(Source: addtoany.com)

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When you’re trying to send a message to a follower, but can’t find the message button on their homepage:

matthulksmash:

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thetolkiengeek:

coldwinterrose:

spoken-not-written:

judal-is-my-spirit-animal:

the-unpopular-opinions:

It is NOT okay to be obese.
Before anyone rages at me, let me explain.
I understand that not everyone is going to be ideally thin, it is okay to be a bit above weight, there is nothing wrong with that. But when it comes to the point where it is legitimately obesity, it is not okay. The idea here on tumblr is that all shapes and sizes are beautiful and you’re all perfect. I get why this is said, and I understand and love that a majority of tumblr is supporting strangers around the world and helping them love themselves. That is okay and I agree with that, but what I don’t agree with is telling OBESE people that they are perfect just the way they are. Obesity is a serious problem and it is not okay to sit back and act like everything is okay with being obese because it’s not. I’m not coming from an aesthetic viewpoint on this either, I’m coming from a medical viewpoint. It is not healthy to be obese and it’s not okay to act like everything is fine, because it’s not.

This, exactly. Being obese is unhealthy, but that doesn’t mean you should go around calling obese people landwhales or assume they have poor moral standards due to their weight. People become obese for many reasons, and not all of those are necessarily their fault. Some of them are even mostly outside of their own control, and those people deserve sympathy, not hate. 

Someone said it.

Thank you. Obesity contributed to my mother’s death. If she would have taken better care of herself she might be here today. I’m totally about self love, but when it gets to the point that its causing you severe health problems, it’s time to act and fix the problem.

Self-love should be about loving your healthy self. If it’s not healthy, love yourself enough to try to get it there. I know it’s not always in your control. I know society makes it difficult. But please, take care of yourself first.

thetolkiengeek:

coldwinterrose:

spoken-not-written:

judal-is-my-spirit-animal:

the-unpopular-opinions:

It is NOT okay to be obese.

Before anyone rages at me, let me explain.

I understand that not everyone is going to be ideally thin, it is okay to be a bit above weight, there is nothing wrong with that. But when it comes to the point where it is legitimately obesity, it is not okay. The idea here on tumblr is that all shapes and sizes are beautiful and you’re all perfect. I get why this is said, and I understand and love that a majority of tumblr is supporting strangers around the world and helping them love themselves. That is okay and I agree with that, but what I don’t agree with is telling OBESE people that they are perfect just the way they are. Obesity is a serious problem and it is not okay to sit back and act like everything is okay with being obese because it’s not. I’m not coming from an aesthetic viewpoint on this either, I’m coming from a medical viewpoint. It is not healthy to be obese and it’s not okay to act like everything is fine, because it’s not.

This, exactly. Being obese is unhealthy, but that doesn’t mean you should go around calling obese people landwhales or assume they have poor moral standards due to their weight. People become obese for many reasons, and not all of those are necessarily their fault. Some of them are even mostly outside of their own control, and those people deserve sympathy, not hate. 

Someone said it.

Thank you. Obesity contributed to my mother’s death. If she would have taken better care of herself she might be here today. I’m totally about self love, but when it gets to the point that its causing you severe health problems, it’s time to act and fix the problem.

Self-love should be about loving your healthy self. If it’s not healthy, love yourself enough to try to get it there. I know it’s not always in your control. I know society makes it difficult. But please, take care of yourself first.

(via southerngamerguy)

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Virgos

thetinyivy:

our time is approaching

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(via rbookbakes)

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bossanovabyss:

anipendragon:

jpbrammer:

George R. R. Martin everyone.

My favourite thing about this gifset is that George R. R. Martin acknowledges both of these methods without insulting or dismissing the other. He is a fantastic writer and I know that some other fantastic writers swear by their methods and discount the others, which can be really disheartening as a young writer. Hearing him describe both of these methods without dismissing the other makes me very, very happy, as I am very much an architect and I always get so sad when every writer I look up to is like “NO PLANNING. PLANNING BAD. WRITERS DONT PLAN.”

So thank you, Mr. Martin.

I am by and large an architect but I am not opposed to my building gaining sentience and doing what it wants along the way, a la a gardener. So I feel this. I feel it so hard. Also:

"No one is purely an architect or a gardener in terms of writers, but many writers tend to one side or the other."

GEORGE R. R. MARTIN, YOU MAY NOT BE PERFECT, BUT THAT SENTENCE IS. THANK YOU.

(via urbanpitch)

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yllwbrrd said: i'm white. does that make me bad?

grrspit:

atchka:

grrspit:

lisawithabee:

afro-dominicano:

yea

p much

Why do white people ask questions like this?  Whenever I get this question, or the thematically similar “Do you hate white people” I just answer with “yes”.

Because that’s the only answer they want to hear.

In context, it makes sense. To a lot of white people, being black IS bad. You can see this evident when a white person tells a black person that they’re “one of the good ones.”

Whites allow for nuances in character for their own race. Rarely are white people grouped into “good” and “bad” categories. You can be a white person who is mostly good, then makes a terrible, terrible decision, but your lifetime of goodness mitigates that bad decision. In other words, white people accept that other white people are complicated and people are the sum of their choices, not merely a reflection of a “good” or “bad” moment.

But Whites LOVE to categorize Blacks as “good” and “bad.” You just have to look at the coverage of Trayvon Martin to see that the fact that he was arrested for smoking pot clearly put him in the “bad” camp right away. After that, Martin’s death was framed as him being the “bad” guy and Zimmerman was helpless but to defend himself.

So, when white people ask “I’m white. Does that make me bad?” what they are REALLY saying is, “I’m white. Are you going to hold me to same simplistic, binary judgement system I hold you to?”

Bolding for truth

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(Source: libraryjournal)